The New Nice Person Supremacist Movement

I was sitting at the dinner table tonight listening to my "too cool for school" son condescending to my daughter, his little sister, to let her know that her life is meaningless and that she ranks just below phlegm on the food-chain.

Now, before I continue this story to tell you of the subsequent revelation that I had, let me forewarn you that I intend to incorporate a small bit of humor into this subject. I do this for a few reasons. One, because the subject itself is very sensitive and so I intend to be insensitive (too much sensitivity can kill a perfectly good mood). Secondly, by injecting humor I can freely make things up that aren't true at all, because if anyone calls me for lying I can simply point out that I was only kidding. And thirdly, one of my most recent FB friends, Sherri Bailey (http://ocd-chick.blogspot.com/) recently indicated that my humor pisses her off so I figured, I'm on a roll... why stop now?

OK, so back to my revelation. And please bear in mind, as I mentioned in the previous paragraph that the stories that I tell here may or may not be true. I will try to preface some of what I say with the phrase, "This part is actually true", but just be aware that this means nothing.

OK, so on with the story. As I was listening to the boy who has generally felt inconvenienced his entire life with having to dwell among us mere mortals, something occurred to me. Well, it didn't really occur to me all in that moment. I have actually felt for a long time (about a week) that it's fairly silly for a person or a group of people to claim that they/he/she are/is superior while backing up said claim of superiority by being, in point of fact, a-holes (and for our young readers, the "a" in a-holes stands for "asynchronous". Just so there's no confusion).

This aforementioned truth applies to everyone from school-yard bullies to neo-nazis, to angry knuckle-slapping nuns with hard rulers and bad breath. If a person or group of people is/are genuinely superior they will not have to go around saying, "I'm superior, damn it! And I'm going to kill everyone until everyone acknowledges my superiority and bows to my twisted will!" They wouldn't have to do that because their superiority would simply manifest itself naturally. They would just naturally be better at everything from water polo to break dancing. Well, at least that's what I thought before...

Now I'm starting to have a slightly different view of what superiority is. The people who have to put other people down, either by insulting them or by killing them, are in fact inferior - even if they are water polo champions. The people who are nice to other people are superior. That's what superiority is.

That's why I've decided to start a whole new movement. The Nice Person Supremacist Movement. And I intend (and this part is true) to compliment everyone I see until everyone acknowledges my superiority and bows to my twisted will.

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